Reflection on: A human being is a single being ... An abstract from my current coaching assignement. Under the guidance of Pat grove and Rod Finnie

“A human being is a single being. Unique and unrepeatable.”

…. Pope John Paul II

Firstly, we would like you to explore it in the context of how you see yourself.

I am not single and I am.

I exist in relationship with others and that always has an impact on me. I am also a product of a place and time.

I experience myself as a single entity and yet I am always considering myself in relation to others.

I am unique in the sense that the I, I call me is an experience that is private to me and that is unrepeatable and so are the possibilities that show up for me. However what does show up for me, is always in the context of my culture both the larger culture and the micro culture of the world I live in. In the sense of being for others.

Similarly I remind myself from time to time that I am a local showing up of the self awareness of the universe and others like me are also a local showing up. So while I most invariable always think of myself as a single being I consider that each of us is essentially of the same stuff or the same self awareness but an individual expression of it.

While that gives each of us a sense of being, for moments I see that we are not single beings but part of the essential oneness of the universe albeit a very special part i.e. self awareness.
(And I am just what I am.)
What is my unique way of being in the world? It is to be found in the choices I make the spaces I step into.



Secondly, we would like you to explore it in the context of those with whom you have the most important relationships in life.

The exercise or question: If I were to look back over my life what would stand out as important relates to the context. My uniqueness is also reflected in the relationships I have created and continue to create from moment to moment.

I can think to strive for what I think I need to do and the danger is this means I miss the essential quality of who I am and this is in the relationships I have with others and myself, and the relationship with myself is always in the context of being with others and therefore for others.


What emotional spaces did you find yourself in?

Uncertainty. Compassion. ‘Sadness’ – a sense of something missing or an incompleteness. I think this relates to the idea we are always stepping into the future and creating what is missing and are always incomplete. And is therefore quite normal to feel this.

Were there any breakdowns that showed up for you? One breakdown was looking at people and remembering they are expressions or a showing up of something. So while we are all different I was reminded of the connection between us. On reflection I suspect that most of nearly all the time do not consider this or create this breakdown for themselves. What would our experiences be like if we did?

Another: Unrepeatable. “So what” Unrepeatable ‘makes’ me feel a bit ‘angry’ fired up. It seems a unessacary bit tagged on for some reason. Yes it is unrepeatable. But Let that not guide your or my actions, there is nothing special about that and noting therefore I must do however there always a freedom to choose and once gone each moment is gone but that does not matter because there is the next freedom to choose and in this sense the unrepeatable is lost and was never really there. It has the potential to get in the way for ‘what could have been’ thinking rather than what might be next.

Stuck on a galloping horse

Approaching 49 I reflect on how quickly my life has zipped past. Rushing from one moment and concern to the next thinking how I have been unaware of the days and years passing.

What shows up in my reflection is that I have had millions of thoughts and feelings but I have not consistently held a a few key binding thoughts to focus my attention and bring into the light the concerns that are central to who I am.

The concerns and values which if I stood, at the end of my life, would bring my focus to that which stands out for me in my life.

And when I practice this. It is not material things, or jobs, or thoughts but a very few things of value to me. Like island peaks of significance standing out across a land / life stretching to the horizon. And much of the time I have spent in the lowlands of my life.

The challenge then for the time which remains is to be able to recognise what is not important to me and let it go and to create a space each day where I can create what is important me